Edinburgh v. San Francisco

Kitty: I'm dying to know how San Francisco compares to Edinburgh.

A-L: You are?? That's so sweet. Are you thinking of getting a passport and coming to live with me? I'd love it.

Kitty: Hell no. Jenny lets me chill on the dining room table. And there's a dog here. He does whatever I tell him. I'm just curious. Besides me, what do you miss about Scotland?

A-L: Well, I miss Kebab Mahal, and that crazy ecstatic feeling you get in Scotland when you see the sun.

Kitty: You read The Sun?

A-L: That too. We see the sun here almost every day, which gets boring. Kind of.

Kitty: So you miss me, some hole-in-the-wall Indian restaurant, and??

A-L: Uh, cobblestones. And IRN-BRU. It's made in Scotland, fae girders. And I miss watching Scottish football at a decent hour. And I miss hearing the Scottish accent.

Kitty: Wow, I never realized how shallow you were.

A-L: You've always known how shallow I am. I only stole you because you matched the color scheme in the flat on Perth Street.

Kitty: So, you don't miss any people? What about all those communists you knew?

A-L: They were Lefties, not Leftists, you foolish cat. And of course I miss my former colleagues, left-handed or not, and the servers at the Christian Center (where you can get a baked potato for 3.00 or 3.50, depending on who's working the cash register), my flatmates, friends from Napier, and friends picked up along the way.

Kitty: And?? Which is better?

A-L: It's too early to tell. I haven't found a cat that matches the decor yet, and I've only met one Lefty (who is a publisher, of course), so it's early days.

Kitty: Wow, you're shallow AND wishy washy.