Monday, November 23, 2009

Six Degrees of NPR Correspondents

A few months ago a real-live reporter from NPR was at the cafe across the street from my house, The Velo Rouge, interviewing patrons about the Tour de France (say in a French accent). Of course I had to talk to him.

A-L (Holding out her cell phone like it's a microphone): Hi, who are you?

Reporter: Ummm, I'm conducting an interview for NPR.

A-L: You're a reporter for NPR?

Reporter: I'm an intern.

A-L: We all have to start somewhere.

Intern: I'm doing an internship at KQED.

A-L: Do you know Sylvia Poggioli?

Friday, November 20, 2009

Kitty Writes On

Public Safety Pete: I see you've resurrected your blog, A-L. And Kitty is back. He's as feisty as ever.

A-L: HE?!??

Kitty: Do I look like a man?



PSP: No. My sincere apologies. But I've noticed something odd in the photo above.

Kitty: The fact that I'm left-handed?

PSP: No.

A-L: That there's a cat on the table?

PSP: No.

Kitty: Is it that Wreckless Cousin Tina's spontaneously combustible dish towel somehow made it's way to Culross, Scotland?

PSP: Yes.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

A Retro Post-Modern Tale (sponsored by Yertle the Turtle)

Sister Maria is reading Dr. Seuss to the pygmy marmosets.

Sister Maria: "Turtle on Typewriter."

Annais: What's a typewriter?

Aila: I saw one at the Children's Discovery Museum.

Kitty: I need a cigarette.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The Creative Process

A-L: I need your help finishing a blog post.

Neighbor JB (aka "The Dog-Father"): What are you looking for?

A-L: A witty closing remark.

The D-F: Who's the speaker?

A-L: The character who gets all the good lines.

The D-F: I can't think like a cat.

Monday, November 16, 2009

PSP & Wreckless Cousin Tina Cross Paths

Recently we gathered with the Irma side of the family to celebrate my uncle and cousin's birthdays. Someone invited Public Safety Pete...

PSP: Um, I don't mean to be a spoilsport, but Tina, you're doing something very unsafe.

Cousin Tina: That's unlike me. Do I have to guess what it is?

PSP: No, it's totally obscure and unlikely to ever result in an accident.

Kitty: The suspense is killing me.

PSP: You should never...

A-L: THAT'S the perfect title for Public Safety Pete's guide to life: "You Should Never..."

PSP: ... hang a dish towel on the top oven handle.

Kitty: I'd like to cancel my advance order for the book.

PSP: If there's a fire in the lower oven, and you open the oven door, that dish towel hanging above it will catch fire instantly.

Kitty: I'm going outside for a cigarette.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Como?

Sister Maria: Blah, blah, blah (in German)

A-L: Blahhhdee blah blah blah (in German)

Annais: Why are you speaking Spanish?
 
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