You'll NEVER Guess

Public Safety Pete: You'll never guess who I saw yesterday.

A-L: You're probably right. Give me some hints. Where were you?

PSP: On Sunday morning? Take a wild guess.

A-L: At a motorcycle rally?

PSP: I was at church. It was my turn to usher.

A-L: Is "usher" Latin for "stand in the narthex and gossip through the sermon"? Or is that Yiddish?

PSP: You'll never guess who was ushering with me.

A-L: You're right. Give me another hint.

PSP: Well, you know the First Lutheran Church in Camarillo went bankrupt?

A-L: Umm, not unless it was on NPR. Or was posted at the bus stop in San Francisco. I guess I'll take your word for it. What's the upshot of their financial troubles?

PSP: More Lutherans for our church.

A-L: Ah, of course.

PSP: So I was talking to this other usher...

A-L: You weren't listening to the sermon?

PSP: It was between Acts. And this guy started telling me that he used to live in Simi Valley.

A-L: He's from the bankrupt church?

PSP: Yes.

A-L: The suspense is killing me.

PSP: And he was our milk man when we lived in Simi Valley! Can you believe it?

A-L: That we had a Lutheran milk man? Or that we lived in Simi Valley? Or that you were socializing during church?

Kitty: All of the above.