Auster-Doyle

You may recall a previous post which featured a conversation between Paul and me about our dear friend Gemma, who has shown a, well, keen interest in attending author events, photographing herself with the author, and then forwarding said photo to friends. Well, our very public diagnosis of this syndrome (named for photos taken with Paul Auster and Roddy Doyle) led to, surprise surprise, no more "author with Gemma" photos. Or so we thought.

Paul: There's an author photo up on Gemma's blog?

A-L: You're kidding. She must be having another spell. Who is it this time?

Paul: You'll never guess.

A-L: Alexander McCall Smith?

Paul: Yes. But this time it's just the photo of Sandy, as he's called. It's not a photo of Sandy and Gemma holding one of his freshly-signed books.

A-L: Surely such a photo exists.

Paul: Yeah, Gemma told me she has one of her and Sandy. She just didn't post it.

A-L: Hmm. So she's trying to hide her problem.

Paul: Now she has Auster-Doyle-Smith syndrome.

A-L: No, no. You can't keep adding names to it. That's not how syndromes work.

Paul: Is there a syndrome of thinking you're an expert on syndromes?

A-L: Perhaps. But you can't change the syndrome's name. It's not like they call Parkinsons Disease "Parkinsons J. Fox Disease" now that Alex P. Keaton has it.

Paul: Well, at any rate she has a new syndrome because she's still suffering from Auster-Doyle but trying to hide it.

A-L: Ok, that could be "Auster-Doyle by McCall-Smith" Syndrome. You know, along the same lines as that Munich by Proxy. And today I got an e-mail from Gemma where she claims she's friends with that aide worker and her parents who were kidnapped in Gaza. What's that all about?

Paul: I'll have to think about that one.

A-L: Ohmigosh, I thought of the most horrible name for it.

Paul: Let me guess! Let me guess! "Waite by the Phone"?