My Neighbor, Sort of

So John Knox apparently lives across the street from where I work. Well, lived, I suppose, but I'm not one for splitting hares. The John Knox House is literally, a stone's throw away. But I'm not about to go throwing anything at the home of the "Scotch Protestant leader", being a Protestant myself. And I often get a hearty chuckle out of folks when I pronounce it as "protest"ant, as it should be. Why is that funny? That's what we are (the Protestant "we", not the royal "we".) Which brings me to Princess Anne's horrible grammar. Excuse me, I mean "the Princess Royal's" atrocious grammar. She was on the telly last week congratulating the city of London on being awarded the 2012 Olympic Games, and she said something to this effect: "the team have worked hard for this", or something like that. Basically, the Princess used the word "team" in concert with a plural verb. Actually, I think she said "the team are." I flipped! So my dear flatmate, Paul, who I haven't seen since that very evening, was appalled that I, a peasant from the colonies, dare to question the grammar one of the Royals. I was so astounded I almost called my sister right then and there, and risk waking up two under two, just so that Maria could calmly explain that "team" is singular. Unfortunately I don't have Princess Anne's mobile number, so having grammar-Maria "on the horn" would not have done much good. So I decided to do the diplomatic thing and say that is must just be a difference between British and American English, and headed to bed, to pray that Mrs. Bettencourt, my high school English teacher, will know that I am forever grateful that she taught this peasant from the colonies that team ain't no plural word. And then I cried myself to sleep. And the next day, one of the very talented editors at work confirmed the singularity of the word "team", and I rejoiced that all of the money my parents spent on my Catholic education was not in vain. Oh, back to the Protestants, my sister had her *first* baby baptized Catholic, and the *second* baby is going to be a Lutheran, a "Protest"ant. I can't wait til the little one is nailing theses on the older one's door. Now that would make a fabulous interdenominational Christmas card.