Update from Dingwall

Norette, our Highlands correspondent, and I had the following conversation...

A-L: Hi. How's life in Dingwall?

Norette: Busy as ever. I'm getting ready for my Birthday party.

A-L: It's not for months.

Norette: The 15th of May is right around the corner. Will you be here?

A-L: Och, aye. What's the theme?

Norette: How'd you know there'd be a theme?

A-L: Just a hunch.

Norette: The theme is Around the World in 80 Days. It's Fancy Dress, so you have to come dressed as something from a country. Ideally one you want to visit.

A-L: I've always wanted to go to Brazil, but there's now way I'll be able to fit this outfit in my carry-on.

Norette: What about a Finnish National Costume?

A-L: I think you have to know how to do origami to make that hat, and I just don't have the patience for it.

Norette: Well, if you need any inspiration, Gemma and I are going to be in Kimonos. And my friend Bev is going to be the Statue of Liberty.

A-L: Wow. Sound great.

Norette: And my granny is going flamenco.

A-L: I'm not familiar with the term.

The Greek Woody Allen

A-L: How are you?

Peter the Greek: I think I'm turning into Woody Allen.

A-L: Tell me more.

Peter the Greek: I just feel like I'm channeling him, more and more.

A-L: But you're Greek.

Peter the Greek: So?

A-L: And you're not neurotic.

Peter the Greek: And?

A-L: And you're not a short divorced Jewish screenwriter and actor.

Peter the Greek: Ok. I'm Larry David as Woody Allen.