Wednesday, December 26, 2007

The Gospel According to Snoopy

In church, on Christmas Eve...

Pastor is reading from Luke 2: 1-20, the story of the birth of Jesus, which includes this passage:

11Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. 12This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

Aila: Mom, mom, that's from Charlie Brown*!

Insert raucous laughter from A-L and Sister Maria.

*A Charlie Brown Christmas

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Car Talk with Irma, Aila & Annais

Almost as funny as Car Talk, are the telephone conversations Irma has with Aila and Annais when they're in the car on the way home from day care.

Irma: Hi Aila, how are you?

Aila: Hi Momma, I'm fine.

Irma: Did you have a good day?

Aila: Yes, I had fun at Gloria's house. We sang songs.

Irma: What did you sing?

Aila: "Away in a Manger"

And then she sang Irma the first verse of "Away in a Manger", paused, and said, "You know Momma, it's a very long song."

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Carry On

A-L: Hello.

Pete: Can you fit a snowsuit in your carry-on luggage?

A-L: Who is this?

Pete: It's your mother's boyfriend, the grandfather of the butternut squash.

A-L: Oh, my travel agent. How are ya, Pete?

Pete: Good, but answer the question. Can you fit a snowsuit in your carry-on luggage?

A-L: For what? Am I doing stand-up in business class?

Pete: No, you might need in it Newark, especially if you're spending Christmas there.

A-L: Why have you booked me through Newark? And who in New Jersey has invited me over for Christmas dinner?

Pete: Well, if you'll recall, you booked yourself through Newark. You know I'D never put you on Continental. And there are snowstorms scheduled for Newark.

A-L: I know, it was another rookie move booking a return flight through Newark in December. I'm sure it'll be fine though.

Pete: Did Irma tell you you only have an hour to change flights? She's worried you'll end up staying in New Jersey.

A-L: Forever? Do we have any cousins there?

Pete: Let me check. Hang on, Irma wants to speak to you.

Irma: Hi, A-L. Have you seen the news? They're expecting snowstorms in New Jersey right when you're landing. And you only have an hour to change planes. I hope you make it home for Christmas. It would be terrible if you got stuck in New Jersey.
 
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